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Here comes the turnip truck!


Find the Barrel, Kermit!

I want to wish all my readers, dedicated and not, a Happy Fall – or Faux Spring – and a Happy Thanksgiving too!

This Thanksgiving I give my sincere THANKS
to all the Under the Turnip Truck readers
– especially my subscribers –
for your support.

My fans out there in Maine are representin'

I also give THANKS for all my friends, but especially for Margaret and Kerry B.

Margaret and Kerry B allow me to have fun writing my blog articles at their expense. They’ve always given me positive feedback and I appreciate them so much.


Kerry B

THANKS to my family for allowing me to have fun with them too – Jim, Nancy, Sean, Jackson (like he has a choice), Mom, Dad (his special feature will be seen in an upcoming post and he will love it), Mama B and Papa B, cousins Cat and Scary Spice and brother Joe.







Mama B

Papa B

Cousin Cat

Cousin Spice

Brother Joe

THANKS to Jim, too, for proofing my posts before I publish them and for being brutally honest when they stink and need to be rewritten.

THANKS to God for making me crazy.



Has anyone been able to tear themselves away from this blog long enough to go outside and enjoy the balmy weather? Seriously, it’s just days before Thanksgiving and my spring-summer garden got confused and started to re-bloom!

My Foxglove on November 21, 2011

This Thanksgiving I’m grateful to have a beautiful and bloomed garden to look out on as I eat my turkey.

Not everyone appreciates the shift to warmer weather; unfortunately, for some, the mild temperatures are drastically interfering with their way of life.

Ralph, our homemade scarecrow, is not enjoying the warmer weather at all. When he was first born back in October, on a crisp fall day, he was so energetic and took his job very seriously. Now, he is letting himself go, literally, and his hay organs are falling out all over the place. He looks like he’s had one too many beers and he doesn’t even drink. He has no energy left to scare away the neighborhood kids anymore. He has lost his hoot-spa! Poor Ralph.

My Ralph on November 21, 2011

This Thanksgiving I’m grateful I am not Ralph.

This, and the polar bears are dying too. It’s true. They’re drowning because they aren’t good distance swimmers and all the ice batches have melted away. It used to be that a polar bear would swim from ice batch to ice batch looking for food. They would also use their time on the ice batch to take a load off and rejuvenate before the next leg of their swim. Now there is no food to be had and they end up dying from exhaustion because they can find no oasis to rest upon.

Man is capable of making snow for all the ski bunnies, maybe he can make a few ice batches for the polar bears too. Come on, folks, it’s our duty to help these helpless creatures. If you don’t they will die and if they die you won’t be able to ogle at them in the various zoos around the world anymore.

This Thanksgiving I’m grateful I am not a polar bear.

The polar bear’s plight is just another reminder that Al Gore is right and the Earth is imploding.

(Note: Some of these facts about polar bears and Al Gore’s theory might be slightly inaccurate.)

Al Gore

So, go ahead and enjoy the unseasonably warm weather while you can because in another decade we will all be extinct.

Speaking of extinction …

This Thanksgiving I’m grateful I am not a turkey!

Until next time…

I’m turning off the turnip truck.